Go AMERICA!

Tomorrow is the Fourth of July and I am psyched.  I mean literally. I love this holiday so, so much! I mean, yes, the BBQs and family and beach and fireworks are awesome.  Hanging out with my family is my favorite thing ever.  But that’s not why I love this holiday.  I love the Fourth of July because I LOVE my county.  I am so proud of being an American, I can’t even express it.  You’ll notice that’s a common theme in my blogs.  Let’s remember that I started this blog because of my trip to Ireland, but don’t let that fool you.  Ireland was awesome, but America is my home, my heart, my county.  It’s true, I’m not fond of everything this county does or of all of its values; however, I still couldn’t be prouder of where I’m from.  I refer you to both my post from the last July 4th (Oh Say Can You See?) or a couple of my posts from Ireland, the first where I taught America to my Middle Students (2nd Paragraph from Where HAS the time gone?!) or when I saw the bodies in St. Michan’s Church Crypt of the Irish Rebels (last 2 paragraphs from Here at the end of all things).  Heck, just click on the tag “America” on the main page of my blog and read all of the ones I’ve posted under that name.  I love my country.

I have noticed that going overseas has one of two effects on the average person.  In general, both sets of people will acknowledge the separate cultures they visit and create an appreciate and respect for them.  The first sort of people will leave their heart overseas, converting their loyalty to where ever it is that they visit.  This bothers me.  Yes appreciate, yes respect, yes love, but remember your roots.  I don’t ask that immigrants to this country forget where they are from.  I except that a person who moves here from Ireland will become American, but also keep their connection to their home country.  There are exceptions to this that I’m just not going to get into right now, because this is not a political blog, so we’ll leave that aside for later.  The second kind of effect overseas travel will have is when a person goes to another country and falls in love with the culture they find there, but they come home with a greater love for their own nation.

That is what happened to me.  I’ve always loved being an American, but now I am downright exuberant of it.  I love my God and my country.  I even love North Carolina more than I did before (which is saying something as I have always loved my state).

However, it wasn’t just overseas travel that increased my love for America.  Teaching has done that to me as well.  It was one thing to study American history as a student and appreciate it, but another thing altogether to impart this knowledge and information to children and teens.  Suddenly, I’m drawing conclusions and making connections and explaining their importance.  It makes me so excited to be able to say, “Look at this! Look what our Founding Fathers did! It was unprecedented, unimaginable, and nearly impossible–but they did it.”  I even now more appreciate the story of Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address (which by the way, today is the anniversary of the last day of that battle).  Before Lincoln gave that short little speech people would refer to the United State as a plural and say things like “The United States are a democracy.” Afterwards, whether because of that speech or because of the war in general, people referred to the country as a singular, such as, “The United States is a democracy.”  Also, think about our pledge of allegiance: “I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands ONE nation UNDER God, INDIVISIBLE with Liberty and Justice for all.” Have you ever thought about why Indivisible is in the pledge? It seems an odd word thrown in there.  It’s because of the Civil War.  I am a Southerner, and I am proud of that too, but the Civil War almost destroyed what the Revolutionary war built.  Afterwards, we realized that we are a people Indivisible.  We are United under our God and our government to stand strong together.  Amen.

I want to end this blog by expressing again the importance of what happened during the American Revolution. Can you imagine what the Founding Fathers felt when they voted on and signed the Declaration of Independence.  Had they failed in their intent, and by all accounts they should have, they had just knowingly and willingly committed an act of treason to the crown.  They had signed their own death warrant.  THINK ABOUT IT!! The Declaration of Independence could have been the Death Warrant of the 56 men who penned their names to it.  For many of them, it was.  Doesn’t that give new meaning to what they did? Doesn’t that hit it home? It is sobering.  I know that I am sobered by it.  And yet, they had confidence in it.  So strong was the confidence of my personal favorite Father, John Adams, that he wrote back to his wife Abigail on July 3, 1776 of the events of July 2 (the day we should actually celebrate the Independence Day, as that was the day the Declaration was adopted) of a great celebration that would continue in this country for the rest of history.  I am posting it hear for you to read carefully.  Read between his lines.  He is thrilled, but also afraid.  He is confident, but also realistic.  But his forethought is incredible.  He knows he is right, and he knows what he had just done.

The Delay of this Declaration to this Time, has many great Advantages attending it. The Hopes of Reconciliation, which were fondly entertained by Multitudes of honest and well meaning tho weak and mistaken People, have been gradually and at last totally extinguished. Time has been given for the whole People, maturely to consider the great Question of Independence and to ripen their Judgments, dissipate their Fears, and allure their Hopes, by discussing it in News Papers and Pamphletts, by debating it, in Assemblies, Conventions, Committees of Safety and Inspection, in town and County Meetings, as well as in private Conversations, so that the whole People in every Colony of the 13, have now adopted it, as their own Act. This will cement the Union, and avoid those Heats, and perhaps Convulsions which might have been occasioned, by such a Declaration Six Months ago.But the Day is past. The Second Day of July 1776, will be the most memorable Epocha, in the History of America. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated, by succeeding Generations, as the great anniversary Festival. It ought to be commemorated, as the Day of Deliverance by solemn Acts of Devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, with Shews, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfire and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more.

You will think me transported with Enthusiasm, but I am not. I am well aware of the Toil, and Blood, and Treasure that it will cost Us to maintain this Declaration, and support and defend these States. Yet, through all the Gloom, I can see the Rays of ravishing Light and Glory. I can see that the End is more than worth all the Means, and that Posterity will triumph in that Day’s Transaction, even though We should not rue it, which I trust in God We shall not.

God Bless America.

Interestingly, this painting is inaccurate and a scene such as this never took place, however, what a great representation of what it means to be American

Franklin, Adams, and Jefferson refining the Declaration

 

One year

Tomorrow is a very important and very sad day for my family.  Tomorrow marks one year since Jordyn went to be with the Lord.  It feels like just yesterday since she was with us, and yet it feels like decades ago.   So much has happened to us since then, and I hardly know where I stand. We have another little one in the family, Mike & Lisa’s Bridget, and little Jacob Daniel who is almost here.  There are some days when I still can’t keep from holding back the tears and there are some days when Jordyn feels so close to me that it’s almost like she’s here.  I can still hear her calling me, “Da-becca.” And watching Cinderella III with her snuggled against me.  And picking “a-torns.” And holding her just after she had been born in the hospital: the first of my baby cousins.  And wanting me to play with her and holding her sweet little hand when I took her to the movies.  And laughing at Faith’s first birthday when Cindy stuffed chocolate on my face.  And her ever joyful last Christmas. There is a part of me that still questions, still wonders if something could have been different, but biggest part of me has moved closed to what I might term as acceptance.   Not acceptance of her death, but of God’s greatness.  I was so fortunate to have a wonderful church family who supported me throughout everything and afterwards, who helped me realize that it wasn’t a vindictive god who took her, but a loving God who cares for her.   Jordyn already has a headstart spending the rest of eternity worshiping God, and I’ll be with her again one day.   Jordyn doesn’t long to be back on Earth, so why should we long for her to be.  That doesn’t make it any easier, but I continue to have hope in Christ who redeems me.
I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.

2 My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

3 Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.

4 I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.

5 Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.

6 This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;
he saved him out of all his troubles.

7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,
and he delivers them.

8 Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.

9 Fear the LORD, you his saints,
for those who fear him lack nothing.

10 The lions may grow weak and hungry,
but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

11 Come, my children, listen to me;
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.

12 Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,

13 keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.

14 Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.

15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their cry;

16 the face of the LORD is against those who do evil,
to cut off the memory of them from the earth.

17 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.

18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

19 A righteous man may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;

20 he protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken.

21 Evil will slay the wicked;
the foes of the righteous will be condemned.

22 The LORD redeems his servants;
no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.

~Psalm 34

 

I’ll be home for Christmas

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”—which means, “God with us.” When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

~Matthew 1:18-25

Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year. Really, it’s more the time of Halloween through New Years, but especially Christmas. I know it is cliche on so many levels for me to tell all of you that this is not because of the “commercial Christmas of America” but because of what the “true meaning of Christmas,” but in reality, that is the truth. I feel like the phrase “the true meaning of Christmas” is thrown around a lot this time of year, between Lifetime and Hallmark channel “original” movies and classic cartoons and whatnot, and that we as a society remember the phrase and not what the phrase actually stands for. I love Christmas firstly because I love remembering that I have a Savior who came to earth in the humble skin of man to save me from myself-from my sin. Sin, being what separates me from God, is not a behavioral issue or a moral issue like many think. The pastor at the church I went to last Sunday described it so perfectly for me: sin is a relational issue. When I sin, it is because I am losing focus on God and what He wants from me. How wonderful to have this time of year to remind me of that. (This is why “Charlie Brown Christmas” is my favorite, I mean seriously, Linus just jumps out and quotes scripture when he tells Charlie Brown the “true meaning of Christmas.”)

There’s another reason that I love Christmas, and that is because I love my family. In my whole life, I’ve never lived further than 2 hours from close family (my grandparents, my dad’s parents, lived in Greenville when I was a little girl; my mom’s parents, brothers, & sister and my dad’s sister and her family have lived in the same city as us my whole life) and not more than one state away from distant family (my granny’s brother and his family live in Tennessee) and even them we are very close to. I love Christmas because we have set traditions every year that includes each member of my family. All day long, I am surrounded my the people I love the most in this world and I love it. Christmas is a time that brings all of us together and I start looking forward to Christmas on December 26th.

Last year was one of the best Christmases I can remember. True, my dad’s parents, who both passed away in 2001, were not there, and I always think of them and miss them on Christmas, but over the years that gets easier. I was able to spend almost 13 years of my life with them and I loved them so, so much and learned so, so much from them. Knowing that they are no longer suffering from their illnesses and are with Jesus and members of their own immediate families (my grandmother was one of 7 children) makes that easier. Last year, though, Jordyn was still with us. It was her first Christmas since she was less than a year old, in 2004, that she felt good! At 4 years old, she was just big enough to be excited about Christmas and Santa and was able to pass that joy onto Audrey, my other uncle’s daughter, who was just 3 years old. She was having a good day, which was so rare back then. She was laughing and playing and having, quite literally, the time of her life. At one point in that day I even took her up to my nativity set and told her the story of Jesus and why we were celebrating that day. I don’t know how much of that she understood, but it is still a memory I cherish. When we lost Jordyn that April, I came to realize that that whole day is a memory I will always treasure.

This brings me to this year. The season for me started out much as it has in the past. Thanksgiving was oh so bittersweet without her there, but I had my other little angels, Audrey and Faith, to run me ragged! The drug me from room to room and played with every toy in their arsenal–and I loved it! It also gave me very little time to miss Jordyn. But now that Christmas is approaching and I’m decorating my apartment and getting excited about family plans, I’m starting to realize what Christmas is going to mean for us this year. Jordyn won’t be there to be excited about hearing Santa’s Sleigh Bells at my granny’s Christmas Eve Party, and she won’t be there on Christmas morning to put joy in everyone’s heart. As I am sitting here alone in my apartment now, it hit me all at once and very suddenly when I was listening to the song “I’ll be Home for Christmas.” Most versions of that song don’t play the original introduction of the song but simply jump straight into the first verse, however, Michael Buble does. The lines, originally meant to speak to soldiers during World War II, really hit home for me: “I’m dreaming tonight of a place I love, even more than I usually do. And although I know it’s a long road back, I promise you, I’ll be home for Christmas.” We are all going to be there this Christmas, including new little Bridget and the new baby not yet born, all of us except Jordyn. When it hit me, I mean really struck at me, I couldn’t help but break out into tears. What are we going to do without her this Christmas?

I’m so thankful now that this celebration isn’t just a commercial time and that I do have the joys of Christ to remember because without that, there would be no getting through it. Jesus came as a little baby boy to save the world from our sins so that we will be with Him again one day. I have accepted Him, devoted myself to Him, and He has washed me clean. I know that this means I will be home and worshiping for all eternity when my short life ends here. And I know that Jordyn, whose life was so much shorter than any of us could have ever believed, is there with Jesus now and that she is waiting for us. One day, not too long from now–because what is 60 years compared to eternity?–I will be with her again. But right now, Jordyn is just a sweet little red-headed angel watching over us. And I know that Jordyn will be with us for Christmas, if only in our dreams.

Audrey and Jordyn Christmas Eve 2007

 

It’s a Boy!

We found out yesterday that my aunt and uncle are going to have a little baby boy!!!!! Can I just be the first to say

I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!

How did I know this, you ask. Well I don’t know. I just had a hunch. But I believe, for one, that this is a very good thing for my family, and I think God knew that too. After all, my brother is the only boy first cousin on each side of the family–it’s about time we had another one! And now, my grandparents can’t tell Spencer that he’s their favorite grandson anymore (the favorite granddaughter ended for me on mom’s side when Jordyn was born, and then came Audrey, and Faith, and Bridget. And on dad’s side, well there were already two girls when I was born….I couldn’t catch a break!). I think it’s good too because my uncle is going to get to have boy-man bonding time with his new son, which is awesome, in my opinion. Growing up with a brother, I know that you def get a different experience if you have just a sister, so I think it will be great for Faith too! Mom told me last night that they want to name him Jacob Daniel in Jordyn (Danielle)’s honor, which I think is a great tribute to her memory. I’m also really partial to the name Jacob, so I’m happy with that. This is such a happy time for my family! We’d appreciate all of your prayers!! Praise Jesus!

 

Little Red

My younger second cousin, Hannah, had to write a memoir for one of her classes. She wrote it about Jordyn.  I cried when I read this, it is so beautiful.  Hannah is a great writer and this is so incrediably sweet.  This makes me realize how much I miss Jordyn, but it also lets me remember all of the wonderfully happy times we had together and how much better off she is now.  I’m so grateful to Hannah for this reminder.

 

Little Red

 

           “Living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.” She was the light in my life because knowing that she had conquered so much already made me want to strive for more and more each day. Her innocent personality shined even through her last breaths. Her small and frail body was complimented by auburn-brown hair, a precious smile, and a giddy laugh. These were the few things I could remember from her short years. Jordyn, kind and carefree, was a princess at heart who always wore a smile up until her final moment on Earth.

 

          Her diagnosis was the beginning and the end of a chapter in her life that would push Jordyn to her limits. It was unexpected, harsh, and gut-wrenching. The doctors were confused; two kinds of Leukemia at the same time? When we were given the news she had only spent twenty- two months of her life on earth and here I stood, untouched at ten years old. It was too surreal. I couldn’t bring myself to accept it. Family and friends all anticipated the rough journey ahead, but all we could do was support each other.

         

          Months after the ruthless diagnosis, she slowly began to transition from a fragile cancer patient into the three year-old that I knew and loved. She had finally started to get better. Unfortunately, she had to be isolated and kept away from other children because of her low white blood cell count. She couldn’t risk catching a disease that would send her spiraling downward; spoiling all of the precious miracles God had given her. On the upside, Jordyn began to frequently visit her beach house and started to spend ample amounts with her family. Venturing out of the hospital was like spotting a shining light at the end of a dark tunnel. While on spring break, I spent most of my time with Jordyn. One night, we were coming back from dinner and when we drove over a couple of bumps in the road she squealed as high-pitched as she could “WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE! WEE! WEE!” we all laughed until our eyes poured with tears her bright, carefree sense of humor truly shined through her dark past.  

         

          While her progress was going great, she went to Disney and stayed at “Give Kids the World” sponsored by “The Make-A-Wish” foundation while she way happy and cancer-free. She loved it! However, a year into her remission, the Leukemia had come back at full force, crushing all the hope we had gained. October through November of that year, she took her second round of Chemotherapy. Her response to the medicine was great, and day by day her cancer withered down to nothing. Unfortunately, while they managed to control the cancer, Respiratory Syncytial Virus, otherwise known as RSV, and meningitis had taken over her body. At the time, her white blood cell count was at an all time low. Weeks later, she dominated Meningitis; Little Red bravely continued to press on against RSV with a heart full of hope.

 

          Everyone is put on this earth with a purpose, whether it is to affect someone in a small way, or to permanently alter their life. I am certain that Jordy’s purpose was to touch others in a way that is indescribable while illustrating her fervent capability to love. The feeling at the funeral was one that was heavy with tears and dampened with sorrow. But oddly, all of us knew that she was happier in heaven than we could ever know until we experienced it for ourselves. Without Little Red’s sweet humor and strong characteristics, I know that I wouldn’t have the same outlook on the world that I do now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

New Life

I am happy to report that my aunt and uncle are going to have another baby!! I love being the big cousin and I cannot wait for another little one.  I can’t lie, I want this baby to be a boy. My brother’s the only one on both sides and we need another little boy.  So, keep us in your prayers and here’s to hoping!

 

People that Make Me the Happiest

There are a certian few people in this world that just make me so happy to be with them and be around them.  I am going to make this post a tribute to my most favorite of those people.

My Mom: Also the person that makes me the most infuriated, but without that she wouldn’t be my mom.  I can call her anytime (although she doesn’t like it after 9:30 !!) and talk to her about pretty much everything.

My Dad: Cliche to do family first? Probably, but it’s the truth.  I’m a Daddy’s Girl and my dad, with his stupid poems that he makes up or the butchering of beach music (jk, dad) he can always make me laugh and smile.  Plus, he still lets me sit on his lap like I’m 2, instead of 21, and that’s just awesome

My Granny: I love my granny so much, probably because I’m just like her (scary!!! lol) She has raised me to love Tennessee, The Wizard of Oz, and Christmas.  She also gives the best hugs.

My Sweet Little Cousins: I love being the older cousin, and when most of your cousins are younger than 4, you have the most fun time being “the oldest”.  I love my angels so much and love to see their faces light up for me.  You learn the most from little kids, thats for sure.

Catherine: My older cousin.  She’s been like a sister to me for pretty much ever.  We always have fun at our sleepovers (which we still have even tho I’m 21 and she’s 27) and just hanging out and talking. She’s precious, cute, beautiful inside and out, and the most amazing person basically ever.  I love her to death.

The Rest of My Family: The most unique thing about my family is that we are so close to so much of our immediate and extended family.  I LOVE being around family and really dont have the time or place to list everyone, between my brother, other cousins, aunts, uncles, great aunts, great uncles, 2nd cousins, 2nd cousins once removed…..the list gets long! The point is, I love them all sooooooooo much  and I love being with them.

Meredith: My best friend from the playpin.  We haven’t lived in the same state since the 5th grade, but see each other as often as we can.  Everytime we hang out, its like no time has passed at all, and that is the best feeling. I love her so much and miss her like crazy!!!

Katherine: My other best friend from the ages of 8-7.  We can talk literature, philosophy, music, history, and boys! We have so many of the same interests and even though she goes to school forever away, we hang out back home as much as we can and can giggle like little girls when we get in the right mood. 

Aimee: My best friend from high school.  Maybe she makes me happy just because of her jeep, lol, jk Aims.  She is so much fun to hang out with!! Even though she scared the crap out of me first time I met her we’ve become very close and I love her to pieces.

Rooms (AKA Juile): My current roommate.  Let me jus say, she makes me feel better about my blondeness, lol. Best roommate I’ve had in college.  Between our Samantha Who? nights or our “domestic” dinner nights, we have a ball.

Kathy: All I can say is: Friends & Laughter – that defines our relationship

Kristen: I love hanging out with this girl.  We have the exact same movie choices.  it’s even better because she can read my mind

My name twin: A Rebecca I met Freshman year with my same first and last name.  She’s awesome because we don’t have to talk to hang out, silence is cool.  But when we start playing Broadway music…watch out!

Kollin: Oh Kollin. You make me feel better about myself.  You’re a great kid.  I can joke around with him and as sarcastic as all get out, but still lean on his shoulder if I’m having a bad day.  What would I do without him?

Kenzie: Disney freak? Only slightly.  Sprinkle Parties? OOOOOOOOOH YEAH!

Wyatt: One of my best friends from high school. I don’t get to see him as much as I used to, but he’s always been there for me, whether I’m wrecking my car (yikes!) or going to Prom (most awesome Prom date ever!). He always knows the right thing to say and gives awesome hugs. Oh and his parents are pretty rockin too; they almost deserve their own category.

My Church Family: All of the amazing people in my college class up here in school.  They welcomed me from my first Sunday, and I’ve been at home ever since.  I love these people so much and look foward to seeing them every week. 

Oh wow, this list is so much longer than I intended.  There are so many other people I wish I could put on here, but I don’t have the space.  Just know that I love all of my friends so much and would be so lost without you guys.  Thanks for making me who I am today and loving me anyway.

 

How His kindness yet pursues me, mortal tongue can never tell

I started this blog for two specific reasons. 1) Was to use it as an outlet to talk about my application process for Ireland, and eventually, hopefully, about my feelings about going once I’m accepted…if I’m accepted.  2) Was to use it as a place to talk about what it means to be “seeking”, hopefully pointing to the fact I believe that Christ is the only solution.   I feel like I have gotten away from those two goals by this point.  Now, granted, I’m not very far along in the Ireland application – I haven’t even turned it in yet.  And of course there turn out to be other things that I just want to talk about that have no relation to one this or the other, but I feel that goal #2 is very important, and I need to get back to it, by talking a bit about where I am now.

Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God

Seeking. It’s such a loaded term really, for one that is so simple.  Praise Jesus that I have found Him, or more importantly that He has found me.  Because that’s really what the Bible says.  God sought US out.  He has given us the choice to come to Him, but His desire is that all mankind would. He reveals Himself to us in so many ways.  God Seeks Us.  I cannot get over that.  It is such a powerful thing. Jesus tells a parable about a Shepperd who goes out to seek for one lost sheep, leaving the other 99 sheep behind.  The Lord is my Shepperd. He sought me out.  He cared for me enough to look for me alone.  And He found me! Hallelujah, what a Savior.

Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love;

So herein lies the essential question: if the God who created the Universe (I know I use this phrase a lot, but having taken Astronomy courses, it is something that is hard for me to fathom.  I am so small and insignificant compared to the majesty of what the Lord created and yet He still cares) sought me out above all others…why do I continue to wander away from Him?  It happens too often for me to even care to think about.  I lose focus on what it means to be a Christian.  I don’t share the Amazing News of Christ Jesus with those who don’t know, I depend on myself more than I depend on Him, I don’t always come to Him in bad times or good, I lose faith, I doubt, I despair.  I allow Satan too often to lie to me, letting me believe that I am not good enough, that I am not loved.  But here’s the kicker – why should it matter if I’m unloved by any human on earth (true or otherwise) – I AM LOVED BY GOD! Can I just repeat that? I, REBECCA, AM LOVED BY GOD I don’t have to do anything to earn that love from Him, because He sought me.  He loved me before I was.  From His laying the foundations of the earth, He knew me and loved me.  But I forget this, I forget that He seeks me, and I forget to seek Him. 

He, to rescue me from danger, interposed His precious blood.

He sought me and he bought me.  Jesus died for me and my sins, they He nailed them to the cross and I bear them no more, praise the Lord, praise the Lord, Oh My Soul!!!! I know I’m quoting a lot of hymns here, but next to scripture, I find that they speak the most truth about what is in my heart.  This is the true heart of the Gospel.  We have to do nothing for His saving grace, but accept it.  That is what it is called grace.  We do not deserve it, but He has given us this gift to accept.  And by accepting it, I have chosen to follow Him, it is not the easy life – but it is worth it. 

Come thou fount of every blessing, tune my heart to sing Thy grace

I have had hard times, my family has experienced what no family should and we still deal with this every single day.  But God has given me blessings too – I have parents who have raised me to make wise decisions and to follow the Lord, and most importantly support whatever I do.  I have a brother whom I love.  I have family connections with “distant” relatives that is closer than most.  I have friends who I know that I can count on.  I am stable.  God has given me so much, and I take so much for granted. These joys should be reminders to me that God has sought me and wants to bless me.  I so often forget this, but that is a sin I confess, but he forgave me for that sin before I even commited it.  When I gave my heart to Him, every sin I had committed in the past and that I would commit in the future was laid on the shoulders of Christ – Let that grace now like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to Thee.

 

Daddy’s Little Girl

Since I’m up here at summer school and my dad’s on a mission trip, I don’t get to be with him on Father’s Day….

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY, DADDY!  LOVE YOU!